Goddamn selfish piece of breathing waste of space gave himself a fuckin’ cookie to celebrate his first day as an ungrateful gathering of crap and said it was for me. Fuckin’ bastard ate it, too! Never been so pissed! He tried making up for his pathetic prank by giving himself a heart shaped fuckin’ blanket. SELFISH FAT BASTARD! I considered stopping his food supply, but I reckon this walking bacteria would survive. Also, I already paid for this heap of disappointment. Goddamn it.
Reporting live from Germany and such!